TheCimburkeFam

Happiness keeps us sweet, trials keep us strong. Sorrows keep us human. Failures keep us humble. Success keeps us growing, but ONLY God keeps us going.

Friday, December 31, 2010

The Seasons of Life

This video has touched me in so many ways during this "season of life" I hope you will find it inspiring.

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Emily ticker

EMILY GRACE "EMI"

Born 5 weeks too soon, we welcomed Miss Emily into the world on June 6, 2008. Weighing in at 4lbs 10oz and 18.25" long, she was the perfect "preemie princess". Her toughest year had begun when "Emi" stopped breathing while in her father's arms, at only 14 hours old. She was born with mucus in her tummy, and after this spell they concluded she had apnea and bradycardia. We were able to go home from the hospital 4 days later on an apnea monitor.

At 5 months old she seemed to have outgrown the episodes so the monitor was no longer needed.

December, 2008 -after use of the monitor was discontinued; she stopped breathing and turned gray, mommy had to give her a few hard blows to the back. Throwing up, she started to cry and breathe again. We were sent to Chippenham Hospital, which later became our "second home". We were released from the PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) the day before Christmas Eve. She was once again, connected to the apnea monitor. The diagnosis at that point was acid reflux hindering her intake of oxygen. At the age of six months, she started drinking a thicker formula and her reflux was controlled on different types of antacids.

Two-weeks past her 1st birthday, the use of the monitor had once again been discontinued. The gross-motor skills of Emily had been delayed do to her medical retrogress. She began to crawl at 14 months and started walking at 17 months.

In August of 2009, Emily had a cold and a fever. She was laid down for a nap and her mama kept going in to check on her. At one point upon peeking in, her mother witnessed her body convulsing uncontrollably. She scooped her up right away and Emily shivered for about 10 more seconds. Loudly talking to her while being held, she stopped and went right back to sleep on the shoulder of her mama. 911 was called and paramedics arrived, they transported mother and child to Chippenham. A series of tests and scans were done and the results were inconclusive.

(during the sleep EEG)

(in the playroom at the hospital)
The neurologist believed she had a seizure due to her high temperature or that it was benign Sleep Myoclonus.

(her cousin Carolina came to visit)

In frequent pain from ear infections, Emily had tubes placed in her ears in November of 2009.

She continued to suffer from sleep problems and the doctors were concerned with her oxygen levels, during sleep. After conducting a sleep study, it was found that she continued to stop breathing multiple times throughout the night. Her pulmonary Dr. proceeded with a Bronchcoscopy to get a look at her airways.

(before her bronchoscopy procedure)
He noticed that her Adenoids were constricting her airway. We went back to her ENT and brought the film with us. He saw the same thing. So we decided to move forward with an Adenoidectomy.

(before Emily's adenoidectomy)

(after her adenoidectomy)
Since having them removed, Emily has been free of any major issues.

Our sweet, yet sassy and very much entertaining 2 1/2 yr. old is such a pride in our lives. We have overcome the many odds stacked against us to get to this point. Aside from asthma and being on the "smaller side" (as expected, noting her parents size) Emily is a typical, crazy, dramatic and loving little girl...with quite a story to tell.

Follow us on this recently created blog, and keep in touch with her antics :-)

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Josiahs ticker

JOSIAH "STRONG MAN"

You will soon understand how Josiah earned the title of "Strong Man". At 28weeks gestation, the uterus which God placed him in began to contract. Medicines were administered to his mother to stop the pre-term labor. He was not due to enter our loving arms until 3 months later. With the intervention of medicine and orders of bed rest for mom, he was given an additional 6 weeks to mature and thrive, from his "home within". When the pre-term labor continued to progress and was not responsive to medicine, Dr.s decided steroids would be necessary. At 33 weeks and 4days gestation, 2 sets of steroid shots were given to his mom, with the hopes of strengthening Josiah's lungs.

Ashley, Josiah's mother, woke up one Wednesday morning certain her water had broken. The family of 3 drove up to the Dr.s office for an examination. The results turned fear into certainty. We were sent to the hospital in preparation of greeting our son prematurely. A Perinatologist was consulted and a high-risk ultrasound was completed to estimate the size of the baby within. He was expected to be 4lbs 10oz. Specialists and Dr.s were confident with his size and his mother was given medicine to augment the labor and delivery. (Much like an induction, with the exception of ruptured membranes.)

After 22 hours of labor, an exhausted mother, father and grandmother welcomed the sweet precious miracle. At 4lbs. 8oz. and 17" long

Josiah was placed in his mother's arms for a moment of connection that only a mother can understand. He was then rushed out of the room in an isolette/incubator and taken to the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Case Unit) and placed on a ventilator. He was not strong enough to breathe on his own.

Perhaps the longest 21 days of a family's life, "strong man" spent in the small room of a NICU with a team of specialist there for his every breath.

From the ventilator to oxygen, to no respiratory assistance at all; he continued to persevere. Josiah had to be placed on a feeding tube until he was able to take feedings from a bottle. This was a struggle for him but he caught on. He had some moments of apnea and he was affected by bradycardic episodes much like his big sister. He was discharged to his mother and father on an apnea monitor. Once home, he continued to grow, despite his reflux issues.

At 2 months of life Josiah stopped breathing. He began to turn blue so his mom gently started to stimulate him, as this was something that frequently happened due to his apnea. From blue he turned gray and dispite vigorous stimulation, and heimlich maneuvers; Josiah went limp in the arms of his persistent mother. She grabbed the phone and called 911 never stopping vigorous stimulation. Just as she prepared for compressions with the emergency operator on the phone Josiah gasped a weak gasp. He was trying to cry but was unable, he fought for his breath and was able to slowly began taking in air. Paramedics arrived, he was still cyanotic 5 mintues into the ambulance ride to Chippenham Hospital. During this event Strong Man was without oxygen for 3-4 minutes and unconscious.
A shaken mother and her son spent a week in the hospital.

Tests were run, examinations were completed and all results pointed towards Apnea. Central Apneas, due to prematurity and Obstructive Apneas due to reflux or a blocked airway. He was treated for reflux, sent home with emergency oxygen and all precautions were given to the parents on caring for him.

Throughout the upcoming 6 weeks Josiah became resistant to many of his feedings. By December 1, 2010 he was only finishing half of a bottle. By December 4th he was not eating at all. After consulting his Pediatrician we were sent back up to the hospital.

He was put on feeding tubes until we finally found the right tube, in the right placement of his body and he began to tolerate his feedings from the tube. The duration of this hospitalization was 12 days. He was discharged on a feeding pump.

Over the course of the next 2 weeks, Strong Man was in and out of the hospital 5 different times. Chippenham Hospital had become a second home. Relationships were formed, knowledge was gained and many prayers were sent up!

At this point Josiah is not gaining weight, he has been at a steady 11lbs 3oz for about a month. He is on a feeding tube that deposits into the 4th chamber of his doudenum. He has begun attempting 1 oz of formula, twice a day. He is not currently tolerating this and only time will tell. The next step is surgery to the LES muscle. Our hopes are that he will be able to get past this point and outgrow this issue. Best efforts are being made to avoid surgical procedures.

As was said each time he was left in the NICU, "BE STRONG STRONG MAN"

He is our living miracle, much like his big sister!!

Top 20 of being a NICU mom

There are so many negative and hurtful things that go along with this journey, but I have decided to not focus on that.

1. I appreciate every little smile, bottle, diaper, look, snuggle and breath that he takes.

2. Made new relationships with the staff and other mothers.

3. Educated further in newborns and how to care for them than I was.

4. I have gotten a lot of tips from the pros!

5. Made a difference in others lives.

6. Emily was able to miss me which in turn, brought her to appreciate me more.

7. I am closer to God.

8. I will be able to mentor other mothers going through similar challenges in the future.

9. Assurance of knowing my baby has been tested and observed and given the chance to expose any abnormalities.

10. New appreciation for the nursing profession.

11. Gotten to experience seeing 6 mothers hold their babies for the first time.

12. Spent my days in a room full of new life and innocence.

13. Emily made memories and got great bonding time with different family members.

14. Taught us patience.

15. More time to prepare for his homecoming.

16. Able to recuperate from labor without caring for a new baby at home.

17. Appreciate tucking my children in and praying with them every-night.

18. Not taking anything for granted.

19. Josiah had a "story" already.

20. I AM THAT MUCH STRONGER FROM GOING THROUGH THIS SEASON OF MY LIFE!!!

How Preemie Parents are Chosen...

Did you ever wonder how the mothers of premature babies are chosen?
Somehow, I visualize God hovering over Earth, selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation.

As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.

"Beth Armstrong, son. Patron Saint, Matthew.

Marjorie Forrest, daughter.Patron Saint, Celia.

Carrie Rutledge, twins. Patron Saint ... give her Gerard. He's used to profanity.

"Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a preemie.

"The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God.

"Could I give a premature baby a mother who knows no laughter? That would be cruel."

"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it.

I watched her today. She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother.

You see, the child I'm going to give her has a world of its own.

She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."

"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter, I can fix that.
This one is perfect.She has just the right amount of selfishness.

"The angel gasps, "Selfishness?! Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive.
Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect.

She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied.

She will never take for granted a spoken word.

She will never consider a step ordinary.

When her child says 'mama' for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.

I will permit her to see clearly the things I see ignorance, cruelty, prejudice and allow her to rise above them.

She will never be alone.

I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air.

God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."

"These Hands"

Written by mommy, during the final days of Josiah's NICU journey

Some day these hands will color a picture

Some day they will hold matchbox cars

Some day he will use them to pinch his sister

Some day to grip handle bars

Some day he'll use them to dig in dirt

Some day they may grip a bat

Some day they'll be sore and hurt

Some day they will change a flat

Some day they will hold a bottle

Some day they'll be covered in grease

Some day they will go full throttle

Some day they'll feed the ducks and geese

Some day they will throw a ball

Some day they'll splash around

Some day he will use them to crawl

Some day to hold treasures found

Some day these hands will embrace a bride

Some day they'll hold a child of his own

Some day they will work with pride

Some day we'll look back to see how they've grown

but for now they reach out for me

and hold onto my finger so tight

wish this wasnt how it had to be

please, strong man, grow big tonight

"Josiah's Song"

"He's My Son" (by: Mark Shultz)

I'm down on my knees again tonight
I'm hoping this prayer will turn out right
See there is a boy that needs Your help
I've done all that I can do myself
His mother is tired
I'm sure You can understand
Each night as he sleeps
She goes in to hold his hand
And she tries not to cry
As the tears fill her eyes

Can You hear me?
Am I getting through tonight?
Can You see him?
Can You make him feel all right?
If You can hear me
Let me take his place somehow
See, he's not just anyone
He's my son

Sometimes late at night I watch him sleep
I dream of the boy he'd like to be
I try to be strong and see him through
But God who he needs right now is You
Let him grow old
Live life without this fear
What would I be
Living without him here
He's so tired and he's scared
Let him know that You're there

Can You hear me?
Can You see him?
Please don't leave him
He's my son

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